300 Foxes and a Donkey's Jawbone
I, who am an elder myself, appeal to the church elders among you. I am a witness of Christ's sufferings, and I will share in the glory that will be revealed. I appeal to you to be shepherds of the flock that God gave you and to take care of it willingly, as God wants you …
A busybody Pastor once accused us (that's me and the Holy spirit) of being Simon the Sorcerer. At the time we were offended and took it personally. Now we simply accept that we were recognized as having power.
We (that's me and the Holy spirit) have communion with God through the Holy spirit. We're in, essentially, a permanent state of prayer. The reason why we do this is to understand and experience joy. True joy
We (that's me and the Holy spirit) have deduced a theory of gravitation from the Holy Bible which makes the Newton/Einstein paradigm obsolete (SciPop). Of course you don't believe us. That's why we're going to prove it, using golf.
Every particle in the universe attracts every other particle in the universe with a force which is proportional to the sum of their mass and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them.
So we (that's me and the Holy spirit (my imaginary friend (sent by my magical sky daddy))) have been practicing golf. Why, of all things, golf? Well, for one,
Consider this for instance. If this passage from Judges is to be believed, and why wouldn't we believe it since it's in the Bible, the stars fought against Sisera. The stars really can't do that if they're distant suns and galaxies.
We have to account for a passage in Psalm 18 where the Bible tells us that God is in both 1) thick darkness and 2) has brightness before Him, at the same time and in the same context.